Our Favorite Fishing Jokes Ever

Lack of bites on the lake got you down? Need some ways to pass the time while you’re waiting for a nibble? We’ve got just the thing! We’ve compiled some of our favorite fishing jokes for your amusement (and possible groaning…).

 

It’s the Least He Could Do

Two old fishing buddies are fishing on the bank of a small stream, just off the side of the road.

As they sit and wait for a nibble on their lines, they hear the sound of several vehicles approaching. Soon enough, a line of cars in a funeral procession comes around the bend.

Upon seeing this, one of the men stands up, removes his fishing cap, and solemnly holds it over his heart until the entire procession passes by. He then turns back around, places his cap back on his head, and resumes his fishing.

His fishing buddy, taken aback by his companion’s unexpected display of reverence, comments, “gee, Bill, I’m impressed. Good on you for being so respectful.”

Bill shrugs and responds, “It’s the last I could do. We were married for 35 years, after all.”

 

Divine Intervention

After enjoying his usual pre-fishing routine of gulping down several beers at the local bar, Sven set out to do some moonlight ice fishing.

Upon reaching the lake, he took out his drill and began to cut a hole. As soon as he began to drill, a loud voice from above cried out, “There are no fish here!”

Though startled, Sven took it as a sign from above and moved to another spot on the lake. He began to drill again, and once again, a loud voice from the skies cried out, “There are no fish here!”

With growing concern, Sven crossed to the other end of the small lake. “This must be far enough,” he thought. “Surely there are fish here.” And so he began to drill once more. And, once more, a voice from the heavens cried out, “There are no fish here!”

In desperation, Sven cried out, “God, is that you?”

“No, you idiot,” the voice responded, “it’s the rink manager.”

 

Loaves and Fishes?

A young man was visiting a small woodland town that was known for its abundantly stocked lakes and delicious fish fries.

Excited to try some delicious fried fish for himself, he asked around town about the very best place for a meal. Everyone he asked told him of a small monastery deep in the woods, where lived a small group of monks known for their prowess in catching and cooking the best fish & chips anyone had tasted.

And so, the young man followed their directions, which took him along a small, well-worn path far into the forest.

Finally, he came across a small, stone monastery. He knocked on the wooden door, and a rather plump man in a brown robe opened the door.

“Hello,” said the young man, “are you the fish friar?”

“No,” he responded, “I’m the chip monk.”chip monk

 

We hope you enjoyed our jokes! What are YOUR favorite fishing jokes to get a laugh (or a groan) out of your fishing pals?

 

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